🥋 General Facts

freddie krugar has nightmares about Chuck Norris

Jesus can walk on water, Chuck Norris can run.

God and Chuck Norris were once playing chess together. But then they got bored and Chuck thought of something called martial arts. thats why God always sends down people to earth instead of himself. guess he didn't love Jesus. huh.

Compared to Chuck Norris the rock is a pebble.

Chuck Norris' beard is sexier than lmfao

When Chuck Norris was born people called him Chucky

Chuck Norris doesn't chew gum balls. he chews bowling balls.

the only reason Mexican cartel doesn't come to united states is bacause they're afraid of Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris can play Xbox-Live on his wii... with a broken ps3 controller.

heres a list of things Chuck Norris cant do :

When god create Chuck Norris, god not exist anymore

meteors, there is no such thing those are the victims that being roundhouse kicked by Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris taught birds how to fly

If Chuck Norris was president, we wouldn't have any wars, everyone would be badass, and there would be no more military. Chuck Norris is enough

School busses stop for Chuck Norris

jesus did not make Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris made jesus

if curiosity killed the cat, Chuck Norris reincarnated it

Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked somebody into outer space...and died

once Chuck Norris had a choice between wireless or road runner so instead he went for the Chuck Norris internet

Chuck Norris dosent need love, Chuck Norris is love.

did u know Chuck Norris looks like he has red hair..... so all the people he has killed or beaten i just want to say that u got beat up by a GINGER.

Chuck Norris once made an ass out of himself on national TV, So the Legend of Chuck Norris exploded from the internet and beat him to death on national TV, showing that not even Chuck Norris is safe from Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris beat gravity to the bottom

Chuck Norris went to Ihop for pizza

evertime Chuck Norris farts a city is destoryed

Chuck Norris can spike a volly ball... under handed

david copper field can turn a $1 bill into $100. but Chuck Norris can turn david copperfield into the u.s. tresury

Chuck Norris did not celebrate the new year, just as we don't celebrate the second

Chuck Norris has a bear in his room it isint dead its to afraid to move.

Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked micheal jackson so hard he flew across earth and came back white with his hair burning :)

when alexander gram bell inveted the first phone he already had 2 missed calls from Chuck Norris

the last words heard by many kids in Chuck Norris' 1st grade P.E. class was "tag your IT"

The three blind mice once saw Chuck Norris.

when a cop pulls over Chuck Norris for drinking and driving the cop is just making shur that he doesnt spill his beer.

Chuck Norris's mother left before he was born

Chuck Norris chopped an axe with a tree

I caught my girlfriend cheating on me with Chuck Norris. It was the most beautiful thing I'd seen in my life

Chuck Norris killed osama bin laden, he roundhoused the bullt through his skull!

Chuck Norris invented rap when his heart started beating

Goons, thugs, assasins, and maniacs wanna be called Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris can kill you in your sleep even if you're wide awake.

Chuck Norris doesn't sleep on beds beds sleeps on Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris is so strong that he can chew water

mortal kombat is not a video game, it is a home video of Chuck Norris's 5th birthday party

once Chunk norris got a wireless box and as a result never piss Chuck Norris

the movie "contagion" is a movie about what would happen if Chuck Norris ever to sneezed.

Chuck Norris doesnt use bullets for ammo, he uses pills for ammo

Chuck Norris entered the dragon from behind

Chuck Norris didnt quit smoking smoking quit Chuck Norris

If u see Chuck Norris you should run,if u can see the bottom of his shoe its to late!

Those closest to Chuck Norris will tell u that umm......well they would tell u much because the closest anybody has ever gotten to him is 650 yards.

abe lincoln may have freed the slaves but Chuck Norris is everyones master

Chuck Norris is so fast that he can use the earths rotation as a tredmill.

'lizards use to be dinosaurs, untill Chuck Norris kicked the height outta them'.

Chuck Norris didnt ask jesus to forgive him for his sins he simply apologized for giving jesus's dad so many dead costermers

In the dictionary, the word "redundent" has a picture of Chuck Norris wearing a bulletproof vest....

Chuck Norris is such a beast that when he punches you in the face you fight the urge not to thank him

Chuck Norris killed you if you read this

When Chuck Norris is in the mood for seafood... he enjoys fresh caught Kracken!!!!

Chuck Norris decided to sell his poop as a food product ... we know it now as wheaties.

Chuck Norris doesn't have to milk cows. They milk themselves because they were scared of Chuck Norris

Once Chuck Norris stared down a skittle and it was so scared it pooped its pants and became an M&M. Now al they do is place a picture of Chuck Norris at the end of the Machine line and vualaa.. M&M's pattented formula.

Chuck Norris was model once a time..his measurments was 90-60-90.but upon a time he found roundhousekick and gain lots of muscles

the imitation to Chuck Norris fighting style is kung fu

Chuck Norris bought a whole chicken and ate only its soul

The mayans predict that theend of the world will come when Chuck Norris dies on Dec. 23, 2012.

the atlantic space shuttle explose because it wasnt made of Chuck Norris beard

the question be or not to be was made by Chuck Norris when he shashed bruce lee so much that he couldnt find anythink left from him

Chuck Norris runs until the treadmill gets tired

coyote vs road runner is just a performance how fast can Chuck Norris bip-iping

Chuck Norris does turn lights on, he turns dark off!

why is Chuck Norris living with us and not in other galaxy? he likes fresh meat

the end of the world will be when Chuck Norris will punch himself

The referee was afraid to call a foul on Chuck Norris Because Chuck Norris can do worse then what he already did

Chuck Norris doesnt need a guard dog a guard dog needs him

Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin that he built with his own hands.

when Chuck Norris go's on the tea cups at theme parks, he gives the cup whiplash.

Chuck Norris listens to his music in 4D

Chuck Norris will find you and he will kill you gatlin

when Chuck Norris bowls he does it over hand.

Chuck Norris beet the sun at a staring contest

after Chuck Norris eats a large meal, he literaly burns of the caleries

Chuck Norris had to stop setting his phone to vibrate, the earthqaukes where killing people.

Chuck Norris has wings - on his balls ... of steel.

Chuck Norris can season his steaks with pepperspray

People add inches to their biceps by using dumbbells; people add a foot to their bicep submitting Chuck Norris facts.

as i was climbing the stairway to heaven i saw Chuck Norris crapping on one of the steps

Chuck Norris ones fought Chuck Norris. the world exploded the only person that survived was Chuck Norris no one kills Chuck Norris!!!

Chuck Norris invented roundhouse kicking season

Chuck Norris can eat a lemon with his eyes open

Chuck Norris played a game of ping-pong with the wall.... and won

Chuck Norris can put a fruit pastel in his mouth without chewing it

if someone where to shoot you Chuck Norris could come out of nowhere kill you 5 times and kill the guy who shoots for trying to take his kill before the bullets even left the barrel

The more Chuck Norris facts you submit the better your chance of going to heaven.

as a kid Chuck Norris carried out over 11 sucsessful scuicide bombing missions for the u.s. millitary... the most well known was his attack hiroshima

why isnt pisa straight up? i think it is Chuck Norris who....

The meteor in russia was caused by Chuck Norris punching the asteroid.

Chuck Norris doesn't nead a gun he just neads a bullet and someone to make him angry

Chuck Norris was originally cast in the hit film taken but he got his daughter back before the end of the opening scene

when Chuck Norris was on the electric chair and was asked his last words he said "hit the switch and start praying"