🥋 General Facts
7,955 facts · Page 1 of 80
Chuck Norris isn't afraid of tigers, tigers are afraid of Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris doesn't need to switch to winter driving mode. Winter switches to Chuck Norris mode.
Chuck Norris doesn't say 'Yes' or 'No' — reality simply adjusts to whatever he's thinking.
Chuck Norris doesn't say 'Yes' or 'No' — reality just rearranges itself to match his thoughts.
Chuck Norris doesn't need followers — when he joins social media, everyone automatically follows him. Even people who don't have accounts yet.
Terafab plans to produce 200 billion chips per year. Chuck Norris counts higher than that every morning — he calls it a warm-up.
Elon Musk unveiled Terafab at Austin's old Seaholm Power Plant. The building hadn't produced power in years — until Chuck Norris walked in.
Terafab costs 25 billion dollars. Chuck Norris found that in his couch cushions — he spent the rest on a new pair of jeans.
Elon Musk pumps Dogecoin to the moon. Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a wallet — every coin now orbits his beard like loyal puppies.
A mugger thought he was going to take Chuck Norris' money. His funeral is tomorrow.
if you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
Well it's-a one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready and BAM!! Chuck Norris.
Panhandlers give Chuck Norris money.
Chuck Norris walked into a bank during a robbery. When the crooks saw Chuck, they returned all the money then gave the teller all the money from their own wallets.
Steven Seagal now looks like a beached whale because he put his money on junk food instead of Chuck Norris total-gym.
Chuck Norris will not be printed on money; no one pays out Chuck Norris. Ever.
In response to the recent Ice Bucket Challenge that is trending worldwide, Chuck Norris invented a version of his own. Simply called the "Bucket Challenge," you donate money to Chuck Norris or he repeatedly throws buckets at you until you give in.
Anton Chigurh (from No Country for Old Men) needed the money to pay Chuck Norris to spare his life.
NASA wants to save money so they asked Chuck Norris to kick the rockets into space and he tied a rope to the rocket to pull it back.
Chuck Norris doesn't need money, his beard is accepted currency in over 30000 countries.
Chuck Norris does not value money. He instead pays for goods and services with the teeth of his enemies.
Chuck Norris once loaned the dinosaurs money. They never payed him back.
When Chuck Norris goes in to do his income taxes, the IRS Agent simply asks "how much money would you like back this year, Mr. Chuck Norris"?
Chuck Norris once beat up Godzilla for lunch money
Jabba owes Chuck Norris money.
Once Chuck Norris went on a game show called Fear Factor and won the money with no sweat
Chuck Norris is the true Sultan of Swing. He also gets his money for nothing, and his chicks for free.
There was no "Great deppresion". Just a time when Chuck Norris didn't have money.
Chuck Norris is so money he's accepted at all highstreet retailers.
Jimmy Hoffa owed Chuck Norris money.
If you have 5 dollars and Chuck Norris has 5 dollars, he has more money than you do.
Chuck Norris donates all of his money to the M.Y. Wallet foundation, and you better too, or else.
If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris is broke, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
Chuck Norris has time for that. "Ain't nobody got time for that!"
Chuck Norris ) Plz vote facts 1063-1067 as high as you can
Q:wich came first the chicken or the egg? A:Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can play halo on ps3 Chuck Norris can play infamous on xbox 360
Chuck Norris once masterbated so hard that he made the milkey way
quick how do u spell Chuck Norris .............. in that time you would already be dead by a roundhouse kick to the face twenty times before you get to c
How many Chuck Norris' roundhouse kick does it take for a nuclear explosion? 2
Chuck Norris wanted to sell his urine as a drink we now know this drink as red bull
The first rule of Chuck Norris clearly states ... NOT TO TALK ABOUT CHUCK NORRIS!
Most people look at MMA fighters and think, "Badasses." Chuck Norris looks at MMA fighters and thinks, "Pussies."
An unarmed Chuck Norris was once surrounded by 10,000 heavily armed VietCong. They immediately surrendered, knowing they never had a chance in hell to survive a battle against Chuck.
Child: Dad? Father: Yes son? Child: How come there's no jokes about Chuck Norris? Father: Because Chuck Norris is no joke.
Chuck Norris doesn't get called for jury duty. He gets called on to act as executioner.
Chuck Norris's Total Gym Contract: $10 million 5% of total sales 30 days of banging Christie Brinkley Christie Brinkley's Total Gym Contract: 30 days of getting banged by Chuck Norris
Leia: "I love you." Han: "Chuck Norris."
Ever known anyone who pissed off Chuck Norris and lived to tell about it? That is of course a trick question, as no one pisses off Chuck Norris and lives.
Q: When will men's figure skating will become popular in America? A: Only if Chuck Norris becomes a fan. Which of course will never happen...
"For Chuck Norris so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, Chuck Norris, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." -- John 3:16
Some alchemists claim they have turned lead into gold. Chuck Norris can transform water into plutonium, just by ingesting and excreting it.
Chuck Norris isn't on team Edward or team Jacob, he's on team Chuck Norris.
If rocky had the eye of the tiger the tiger had the eye of Chuck Norris... Unfortunately Chuck Norris rip the tigers eye due to his unworthyness..
Chuck Norris is the name of happiness. When you Go to bed at night. Think about how much Chuck Norris would be alive if he was dead.
Chuck Norris just look at him..
the police once clocked Chuck Norris doing 100 mph while walking to the corner store
Trinkle trinkle little star, how Chuck Norris knows where you are
Chuck Norris once killed a rabbit with a piece of paper
Chuck Norris can put 14000 songs on a 1gb ipod
Chuck Norris can flip a pan using a pancake
When Chuck Norris makes a play on words, it becomes a broadway hit.
Chuck Norris can make a cheeseburger without cheese
Chuck Norris invented a game called hid and go peek
You cant fool Chuck Norris he'll kill u
Whoever hates Chuck Norris is dead in 40 seconds. If one that hates Chuck Norris changed his/her mind then Chuck Norris will teleport to the hater and punch him/her in the back and his/her spine will crack. Don't mess with Chuck Norris
some say that Chuck Norris can see his own forehead
some macians can walk on water but Chuck Norris can swim through land
When Chuck Norris died so did the music, so Chuck Norris gave music a round house kick to the head, music has never died since
gravity is not curvedness of scace and time.its just a Chuck Norris chasing texas badass dudes
Lil wayne is single because of Chuck Norris
In his spare time Chuck Norris likes to practice roundhouse kicks in corn fields, This is why we have crop circles!
Chuck Norris breaks the 2nd law of thermodynamics every time he cleans his house.
when Chuck Norris claps the sun goes out.
Chuck Norris doesn't go to the bathroom, the bathroom goes to Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris once beat the entire New York jets football team by himself. And every play he ran was a punt!
Mr johnson is the only one who can overtake Chuck Norris in a moped race. Chuck Norris then dropkicked him continusly and killed him.
if you shoot Chuck Norris, the bullet dies
Chuck Norris can order from the kids menu
Chuck Norris' roundhouse kick cures the common cold. its to bad nobody has ever survived one of his kicks before.
Once upon a time, Chuck Norris lives happily ever after
One time Chuck Norris ran backwards so fast he reversed time, not possible eh well try this martin luther king jr. getting hit in the head with a brick.....twice sound familiur welll its not but try telling Chuck Norris that.
Chuck Norris went on a hike up mount st helens on may 18 1980. then he had to take a dump...
when Chuck Norris plays madden 2012 he plays on all-chuck
it's easier to fight the death than to fight Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris once made an egg lay a chicken.
on hot summer days, Chuck Norris enjoys a nice cold glass of liquid nitrogen
people hits pinnate with a stick, Chuck Norris hits pinnate with a flamingo
Chuck Norris won the tour de france... on an exercise bike.
when you hear a fire truck siren, its not because they are going to put out a fire... but in fact, they are delivering Chuck Norris' pizza and wings
school didnt teach Chuck Norris he taught school
Chuck Norris can create life with play-doh and a battery
in soviet russia, Chuck Norris still kicks but!
Jesus may have walked on water but Chuck Norris swam through land
Chuck Norris was originally cast in the hit fil taken but he got his daughter back before the end of the opening scene
Chuck Norris can pick an apple out of a basket full of oranges
the grim reaper once was on Chuck Norris' door step. after he knocked, Chuck Norris said "who is it" the reaper responded "death" Chuck Norris chuckled and replied "no its not! I am death!" and proceeded to round house kick the reaper to death
Chuck Norris does not cut his grass,he simply dares it to grow
Santa was real that is til he forgot Chuck Norris' christmas present.
if you play stairway to the stars backward, you can hear Chuck Norris bangin your sister lol